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Feature Guide: Self Check-In

How to love: It’s OK to be together, it’s OK to be alone

Photo Illustration by Chase Gaewski | Photo Editor

Jess Greenlaw came to Syracuse University thinking she had found her perfect match. She and her boyfriend had been dating since their junior year of high school, and decided to stay together when they went to different colleges. But during their sophomore years, the two split up, and suddenly Greenlaw found herself single for the first time in four years.

She spent the next two years making the most of her single status, and in that time learned a lot about herself. Now a senior, Greenlaw is dating someone new and is excited to give relationships another shot.

Greenlaw’s story isn’t unique. Many college students spend their four years bouncing between single life and commitment. But the jury is still out about which relationship status is more beneficial. While some relish their single status and “make the most of their college years” by mingling with as many people as they can, others bemoan their singularity, daydreaming of meeting their other half.

There are those who swear their time at school has been completed by their significant other, while others fear that a relationship will limit their experience. In the mix of opinions, it can be hard to figure out who’s having a better time.

“Relationships overall are an important part of what it is to be human,” said professor Joseph Fanelli, an instructor in the David B. Falk College of Sport and Human Dynamics. “I do think the purpose of life is to have prolonged and intimate relationships. A feeling of belonging is an important part of who we are.”



Fanelli teaches CFS 425: “Lust, Love and Relationships,” as well as several other courses that cover the nature of sexual attraction and relationships. He said that though sexual relationships can be gratifying, it is more important for individuals to find people who make them feel known and accepted, be they friends, partners or any other kind of bond.

It’s tough to know which path is right for you, but Pulp has spoken to some students who know from experience. The conclusion was evident:

It’s OK to be together. It’s OK to be alone.

 





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